Pregnancy #5: Miracle Baby
After four losses, my husband and I weren’t sure what to think about Pregnancy #5. The stick showed that infamous double line in the fall of 2014. What would happen?
We hoped that the pregnancy would last. We hoped that we wouldn’t have another miscarriage over the holidays. We hoped, we hoped, we hoped. But we didn’t know…
Our previous miscarriages had occurred just after 10 weeks and nearly 11 weeks.
The First Ultrasound
I remember our first ultrasound at 11 weeks. I walked in the room and started crying as soon as I saw the midwife (she was a colleague of my normal midwife so I hadn’t even met her before that day).
What a sweet lady. She handled my tears perfectly and said I could either wait, or just cry away as we looked for the baby. I chose to keep crying…
Then, there was a heartbeat! What?!?! I had heard heartbeats before, so I didn’t want to get too excited. But this heartbeat was in a baby that was 11 weeks gestation!
We couldn’t convince ourselves to get too excited yet though. We just kept thinking “If we make it through Thanksgiving, we’ll stop worrying.”
We made it through Thanksgiving, farther than we had ever made it before, but we couldn’t stop worrying.
“If we make it through Christmas, we’ll stop worrying.”
We made it through Christmas…
A Bump in the Road (and my Belly)
In the middle of the night in January, I woke up with severe pain in my abdomen. I was worried sick because I knew this wasn’t good…and it felt suspiciously like kidney stones.
But, I hadn’t had kidney stones in 10 years, so how could I possibly be plagued by these things again? And what would it do to the baby?
It didn’t matter. It hurt. BAD. So we headed to the ER.
Who knew, kidney stones while pregnant will get you admitted into the hospital?
Sadly, I spent much of my 2nd Trimester in the hospital.
Not sadly – quite fortunately, in fact, they had tremendous chocolate cake… So, that might have been the only redeeming factor. Oh, and I didn’t have to cook or clean or do anything. That was nice too.
So this is Labor
Two days past my due date I started to have odd rumblings in my uterus. I hadn’t experienced anything like that yet, so I called my sister -a mother of 4 babies- to check in. Sure enough, she said it sounded exactly like the beginnings of labor.
That night, we watched our show “Turn” and then went to bed. Tried as I might, I didn’t sleep well. Around 1:30 am, that night, the contractions were bad enough that I could no longer stay in bed. So, I got up and started timing them.
And, because I’m a nerd, I created an Excel Spreadsheet with macros that timed my contractions for me. Every time one started, I clicked a button. When it stopped, I clicked a button. Then, it did all the math to tell me how long the contraction was and how far apart my contractions were. Yes; I’m a nerd. And yes; I will post my spreadsheet on here someday so you can use it too!
I woke my husband around 2:30 and called my mom. Mom came over soon after and she and my husband did what they could to keep me comfortable at home as long as possible. A few hours later, it was time to call the midwife and doula. We headed to the Birth Center around 5:30 in the morning.
I will never forget walking into the room with my midwife (the one who so sweetly comforted me during that first ultrasound) and doula in the room. Upon seeing them, I proclaimed how wonderful labor hormones were because “Gosh I love you two and I’m so happy to experience this with you!!”
Those lovey feelings didn’t last long though because soon after my arrival I started vomiting. And, sadly, I hadn’t actually progressed very far even though my contractions were super close, hard, and long. While the midwife would normally have to send someone home who hadn’t yet reached 4cm dilated (I was only 2cm), she decided to keep me there because the contractions were bad enough to be considered “active labor”. It’s a good thing too, because I threw up with nearly every contraction for the remainder of my labor and had to be on an IV.
Soaking in the tub was nice. Sitting on the toilet was not. Let’s leave it at that. I’ll write more later about how wonderful Doulas and Midwives are and how they saved the day…
A Truly Redemptive Birth-Day
One of the defining moments on this day was when I broke down crying and shared with my doula and mom that I was really upset that my baby was coming on this particular day. You see, this exact day was the day that I had lost my third child to miscarriage. It was a precious day of grieving for me and I wasn’t sure I wanted to share it with my son’s day of birth.
I don’t remember everything they said, but they comforted me and prayed for me. They reminded me that God is a good God who gives good gifts and that perhaps He was redeeming this day. Not that my third child was any less important or worth grieving, but that this was a gift of a very bittersweet day.
The day was redeemed because Nathan was born at 9:27 pm that evening.
Born a Swimmer
For the most part, labor is really quite terrible, especially when you’re hooked up to an IV to replace fluids you’re puking with every contraction.
But, one of the best parts of this day (maybe not in the moment, but hilarious now) was how Nathan made his entrance. Of all my “Birthing Plans”, my #1 rule was that I did not want to give birth in the bath tub…
I’ll never forget the feeling of “TIME TO PUSH!” Wow. That was a sudden, crazy NEED to push that kid out with everything I had. My husband describes that 47 minutes (a short amount of time according to my midwife) as a scene from the TV show 24. Apparently I sounded like I was being tortured… I maintain that it was more about effort than pain. The pain was the 2 hours prior during the Transition stage.
My midwife told me to tell her when I felt like his head was very low. Not long after, he felt low so I told her. She didn’t think it could possibly be happening that fast, but being a midwife who trusts my body and instincts, she decided to check. Surprisingly (for her), he was quite low. She informed me that it wouldn’t be long and I should tell her if I felt him get much lower than that.
With the next contraction, I felt him shift so I told her. She was surprised, but checked anyway. “Wow, Sarah. I think it’s time to move you to the bed. He’s on his way!”
I moved…I contracted…I felt him shift again so I checked. “Um, I think this is what you call ‘crowning’?!?”
My midwife checked again. “Oh dear…Sarah, I am so sorry, I think your son is going to be born in the bathtub.”
I’m a very go-with-the flow person, I just went with it and asked what to do next.
I moved…I contracted…I felt his head come out. “Uh, yeah. His head’s out. His head is out!”
My midwife felt again and she said “Yup. Not only is his head out, but so is his hand and he’s holding on to my finger!”
Another contraction and splashing and chaos and laughter ensued. My son was out, thrashing around, and holding onto my midwife’s finger as she tried to catch him.
She was thoroughly impressed because most babies born in the water come out completely docile and oftentimes peacefully asleep so you can hold them under the water and adore them for a moment before bringing them out into the air.
Not so with my kiddo. He came out swimming.
And, he hasn’t stopped with his active, fun, outgoing self since. He is perfect in every way.